Title: What in the Magna Draconis
Co-authors and/or betas: None
Genre/s: Parody/Humour/Crack
Summary: Moordryd is dumbfounded, absolutely dumbfounded. Word found out about Armeggaddon, and Moordryd knew things were going to turn out bad. It turned out far worse than what and how he thought it would. One-shot, crackfic.
Main character/s: Moordryd, Word
Pairings: None (implied, but nonetheless, none)
Rating: G to PG-14 for maybe some innuendo
Warnings: Crack. Intentional OOC-ness. Implied slash.
Word Count: Approx 1850
No. of Chapters: 1
Complete/WiP: Complete
Concrit: Neutral
Mary Sue: No.
Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Booster. If I did, this would never, ever happen. Ever.
A/N: I swear. I have no idea either. Honestly. I apologize. But it was bothering me so much, that I had to write it down right away so it would begone. Seriously, though, I have no idea where it came from. If you excuse me, I’m going to do unwanted homework now in order to regain my senses.
Be prepared for horror, and intentional, horrible, unexplainable OOC-ness. Be very, very prepared.
- - - - - - -
“Moordryd!”
The white-haired teenager winced and rolled his eyes as he put down a red ventilation gear and spun his heel around to see none other than his father standing at the doorway, his left eye twitching and his shoulders shaking from raw rage.
“You called, father?” Moordryd drawled, folding his arms. “What do you want this time?”
“What do I want?” Word hissed, his teeth clenched. “What do I want? Oh ho, Moordryd, my son. What I want, is for you to explain yourself!” he roared.
Moordryd raised his arms immediately as the impact of Word’s bellowing voice caused his hair to fly back, as well as knock the red ventilation gear and a half-finished Drag-Slush drink off the table behind him. He lowered his arms slightly, his face a painting of bewilderment. “What…did I do?” he barely uttered, blinking in a mixture of shock, confusion and fear.
“Oh, what did you do!” Word shot back contemptuously, waving his hand dismissively. He glared daggers at Moordryd. “You know what you did!”
“No, I don’t,” Moordryd responded, tentatively taking a step back and grasping the Dragon Eye amulet around his neck cautiously. “Otherwise, I would have answered by now.”
“Don’t take me for a fool, you always do!” the other white-haired man snapped, throwing his arm forward and nearly slashing off Moordryd’s nose with his clawed finger (much to Moordryd’s relief). “How dare you think you can just go behind my back doing as you very jolly well please.”
“But – ” Moordryd stuttered, raising a finger.
“Oh, you’ve done many, many things that I’ve disapproved of, but this, Moordryd, this is the final straw!” Word continued ranting, approaching Moordryd dangerously, finger still pointed in between Moordryd’s eyes. “This is disgraceful, utterly disgraceful, not to mention completely unacceptable!”
“Father, what are you talking about?” Moordryd yelled back, starting to get very fed up with how this conversation seemed to be going nowhere.
Word pulled his arm back sharply and placed his face directly in Moordryd’s. “Don’t think that I don’t know about you…and your little escapades and misadventures with your new friend,” he whispered darkly.
Moordryd’s eyes flew wide open, and he felt himself freeze up. “Wha - what new friend?” he spluttered, quickly sidestepping out of his father’s glare. “That’s absolute dragon scales, I have no idea what you’re talking about, father! You’re clearly imagining things, the age and the stress is getting to you!”
“So I’m senile now, am I?” Word barked, grabbing Moordryd’s shoulder roughly, who gulped nervously and tugged at the collar of his suit. “So I’m old now, am I? So old, that I have clearly no idea about your new friend? Hm? The one you’ve been hiding from me, that you’ve been gallivanting off with for the past few days!”
“What?” Moordryd gasped, and turned right around. “But…but how did – ”
“Like it isn’t obvious!” cried Word as he threw his arms in the air and began to pace. “Here I was thinking, you have a good crew, you have nice friends, a nice dragon, and enemies to fight against when needed be, but to…to go off with some random male and gallivate and frolick about – ”
“Wait, what?” Moordryd bellowed, his eyes bulging out of his sockets and his jaw dropping open.
Word scoffed and glared at him irately. “Yes, Moordryd! That good-for-nothing ruffian of a troublemaking man if I ever saw one, Moordryd!” he growled.
Gravity took another toll on Moordryd’s jaw as it dropped down even further. “WHAT?” the younger Paynn shrieked.
“Oh, please!” Word groaned, continuing to pace in anxiety and anger. “The sudden rebellious attitude, the neglect to obey orders, the unwillingness to even be around me…Moordryd, it’s as obvious as daylight! You’ve been hiding that man away from me!”
“Look, you’ve got it completely wrong!” Moordryd shouted, his left eye beginning to twitch. “It’s not what it looks like, honestly!”
“That’s what they all say!” Word snarled, waving dramatically with his clawed hand. “Sure, you’re ‘just friends’. You’re ‘taking it slow’. But what happens soon after? You start getting closer, intimate, you giggle at every flattering comment he gives you, then you hold hands, and before you know it – ”Word sighed, burying his head in his hand. “Oh, Magna Draconis, I don’t even want to think about it! And to think I thought you knew better, Moordryd…”
“Good Gawaynn, father!” Moordryd snapped, shaking his head angrily. “Seriously! Of all things for you to be angry at or even consider – ”
“It’s for your own good!” Word retorted. “I want you to stop seeing this man immediately!”
“What? No!” Moordryd screeched. “Just listen for a moment – ”
“No, you listen for once!” Word ordered, stomping his foot furiously. “This person is a bad influence, and his ideas and independent speech and all that scales is getting to your brain, and I don’t like it one bit! It’s changing you, Moordryd, can’t you see that? But no, you’re far too much into him to see it!”
“Father, I’m not involved with him!” Moordryd protested, but Word suddenly began to rummage around the room. “Now what are you doing?”
“Trying to find any source of information about him!” Word replied curtly, pulling out a VIDDComm and beginning to scroll through the contacts.
“What? Oh, come on!” Moordryd seethed, ready to punch somebody in the face. Word suddenly gave out an anguished cry, causing Moordryd to nearly headwall again. “Geez, now what?”
“Who in Magna Draconis’ name is Valynzz Elektronn?” his father screamed, his grey eyes blazing. “What kind of parents give his or her child such a name? Is he your friend? A friend of your friend? Huh, more trouble?”
“Father, that’s Vizz, for Drakkus’ sake!” Moordryd groaned, ready to pull out his own hair as he stormed over and snatched the VIDDComm away from him. “Look, if you just let me explain!”
At that moment, the amulet around his neck pulsed. “Moordryd,” a deep, ominous voice rumbled.
Word suddenly recoiled with a horrified gasp, and Moordryd froze. “So, that’s how you communicated with him!” Word yelled, pointing a finger at it vehemently.
“You can hear him?” Moordryd cried, not liking where this was going at all.
“Wait, what?” the voice said. “Moordryd, why is your father here? Why can he hear me? What is going on?”
“You!” Word hissed, and before Moordryd could protest had snatched the amulet right off the chain and glared at it. “How dare you think you can just go off with my son doing whatever it is you very jolly well please!”
“What?” Armeggaddon gasped.
“Armeggaddon, forgive me,” Moordryd immediately interjected, shifting his eyes uneasily. “My father, he’s – ”
“Armeggaddon? Armeggaddon?” Word echoed incredulously. “Who calls themselves Armeggaddon? That’s clearly a name to be wary of, and you, hanging around with dangerous men!”
“And just what are you insinuating by that, you fool?” Armeggaddon snapped back.
Word gasped. “Incompetence!” he barked, slitting his eyes and furrowing his brow. “How dare you disrespect your elders!”
“I am far older than you think I am, Word,” Armeggaddon retorted annoyedly. “Far older than you, in fact.”
Another gasp. “Inconceivable!” Word howled, briefly turning his head to glance at Moordryd almost sadly. “An older man that could be very well your grandfather, Moordryd? Oh, my…”
Moordryd resisted the burning urge to pick up the red ventilation gear and throw it at Word’s head as his left eye twitched rapidly. “You’re nothing more than a fool, Word,” Armeggaddon growled. “He doesn’t need you!”
“Oh, shut up!” Word barked, ready to break the pendant and crush it under his inch-wide heels. “What would you know?”
“Far more than you do!” Armeggaddon shot back, the amulet beginning to glow dangerously brighter. “You don’t understand how he feels. I can be there for him!”
A third gasp, and a completely taken-aback Moordryd as he nearly fell over in shock. “Armeggaddon, what are you saying?” Moordryd said, regaining his balance.
“You told me yourself, Moordryd, how much problems your father was giving you!” Armeggaddon exclaimed, ignoring Word’s fourth gasp. “And I helped you through those times, didn’t I? Unlike you, Word, I know what’s best for him!”
“Lies and slander!” Word roared while Moordryd turned back to the wall and hit his head against it hard. “He is my son, and therefore I know what’s best for him!”
“Scales, scales, and dragon dung!” Armeggaddon scoffed. “You treat him like nothing more than a grain of dirt, and show him absolutely no respect or appreciation! I show him all that, and more!”
There was a sudden pause, and it was as though time stopped. Probably waiting for the raging dragons of hell to unleash, Moordryd thought as he trembled with fury. This is getting WAY too weird! I mean, what in the Magna Draconis?
“What’s more?” Word demanded. “What! Is! More?”
More awkward silence. Moordryd inhaled sharply.
Armeggaddon’s response was almost coy. “What do you think?” he responded.
Moordryd exhaled very, very angrily.
“Why, you – ” Word roared, gripping the amulet tightly. “Tell me this instant, or I will find you, and I swear to the Magna Draconis if you don’t or if it is something that will just make my blood boil for what you’ve done to Moordryd – ”
“It’s far better than what you’ve done for Moordryd,” Armeggaddon muttered.
Word’s eyes bulged, and he opened his mouth. “Oh, my…” Moordryd seethed, then slammed his fist against the wall. “The Dragon Booster is Artha Penn!”
Word spun around to look at him dumbly, and Armeggaddon’s glow dimmed slightly. Moordryd gave a long, relieved sigh and rested his back against the wall. Thank the Magna Draconis for that.
Suddenly, there was a loud explosion right next to him, and Moordryd reeled back in terror as the Black and Gold Dragon of Legend appeared in front of a large, gaping hole in the wall, with a very upset Dragon Booster perched on his head.
“You said you would never tell!” the Dragon Booster cried, and whimpered.
Moordryd just stared in absolutely disbelief at him. “Oh, forget this!” the teenager said, then promptly bashed his head against the wall again and passed out.
End