Title: Cleo's Journal
Description: Insane Sanity
Description: Insane Sanity
Cleo Rania - January 24, 2007 05:19 PM (GMT)
Old Journal-Uncut but Edited- The movie, er, post!:
Entry #1 (Nov 9 2005, 07:02 PM)
Dear Journal,
Today was my first of being a Digimon tamer. My partner, Peter, A Kapurimon that seems determined to digivolve 'only when the time is right', is quite fun to be with. He is the first friend I have had in quite awhile. Peter seems to be, if you will, a foil of me. I wonder if all digimon and tamers are like that. Recently I was visited by AJ, another tamer, and his labramon. They seem quite... nice. AJ mentioned 'light and dark tamers'. Though I'd defenatly be on the light side, I do not hope to be in any battles. Being in such a war would deter me from my goal, getting Peter strong enough to... well, to be powerful enough to be in a war if such an event happens. Wow, I really have no idea what im trying to say.
I guess this is my opinion: (Note, this is just a stupid rant made to make my journal look at least partially interesting. I really dont care what people here choose to do)
Anyone can be 'dark'. It is easy and fun to have no rules in life. To pick on others. To act superiour. It is the cowards way out! Not only that, but humans are weak against its pull and are easily drawn to it. Morallity has no direct benifits, is hard, doesn't pay the bills, and really won't always make you feel better. Cheesy as what I'm about to say is, I believe it is right: Morality is worth it. Mentally, physically. Forget what I said earlier about it not being able to make you feel better. Just to know you didn't fall prey to darkness is a huge... er... I dont know the word. Oh well. Today's soapbox rant is over, time to sleep!
-Crazy Cleo
PS.: Just because you're my journal I wont reveal all my secrets to you yet ;-)
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Entry #2 (Nov 9 2005, 10:49 PM)
Dear Journal,
Yeah, it's that geeky kid who writes boring stuff in you again. I finally told someone my story, and I felt 100 times better afterwards! Its good to have friends. I know I sound TOTALLY weird when I say that, but it's true! Anyway, lemme let you in on the facts of my life up to this point:
When I was about 5, 10 years ago, I was brought to Sensai Peter's house. My brother had to travel the world for his job, so he couldn't take care of me. At first I was quite scared of the friendly old man, and just wanted to have my brother wth me. However, Sensai was very nice to me and I quickly began to love him. By the time I was 8 he taught me much more then I would have known if I had gone to a regular school up to 10th grade! He taught me some martial arts, sword skills (which I always manage to mess up), mythology, spirituality... in other words, alot. He had friends over often but none of them were ever my own age just... really, really old. I didn't mind, but Sensai, always seeming to be one step ahead, knew this would not effect me positively if I could not interact with people of my own age. When I was 10 he took me to a park, where I saw lots of children my age, playing with each other. When Sensai let me go up to them, they started to tease me immediately. Even though I could have fought them, which of corse would have gotten me in alot of trouble, I just ended up running out of the Park, crying. I really dont remeber what they said, but that doesn't matter. I was so upset that I ended up finding a secret spot and cried there for least an hour before Sensai was able to find me. He looked really mad, for some reason, which made me sob even more. Then he became symethetic and tried to calm me down. The parents of the brats who teased me talked to Sensai and wanted their children to apologize to me in person, but Sensai decied it would be best if I recovered first. I suppose it wasn't really a big deal and I didn't have to make a fuss over it, but I still lived a sheltered life up till then.
Then, a week ago, Sensai grew gravely ill. I didn't know what to do. He was taken to the hospital, where I visited him everyday. I got really into digimon at that time, since Sensai had bought me one of the video games a few days before he got ill. I always wished I could get an Angemon to help heal Sensai. I wondered if, perhaps Sensai died, he could come back as a digimon? Would that be better then being a human?
The day before I ended up in the digital world, I went to visit Sensai. His doctor was there, and told me to come with him. I was prepared for the absolute worst. That didn't happen. I think. However, Sensai had to go through an intense operation. Sure, we could a afford it, but it often did not work and had fatal results. But without it, he'd absolutely die within a week. The doctor let me make the decsion, but first let me talk to Sensai. When I saw him in the hospital, with tubes everywhere, his body frail and not at all like the holy-man-like teacher I had known. I couldn't keep from crying. He opened his eyes and slowly he looked towards me. He told me, in an incredibly weak voice, that it had been a pleasure to teach me, and that he wanted to be allowed to die.
He told me that I was ready to face the real world and should not have to worry about his health every second. It hurt me to know he only thought of my life and not his own during his possible final days. I completely broke down. I kneeled at his beside, shoved my face into a pillow near his shoulder, and cried for a good 15 minutes. All that time, I could have sworn Sensai was stroking my hair, which he always did to help me fall asleep.
The doctor eventually led me out and told me he could wait another day for my answer. I ran home, where everything reminded me of him. It was HIS HOUSE, he was the one who gave me this shelter, he gave me everything! Looking at the digimon game I cursed the creators for not sending me Qngemon, even though I knew it was impossible. Such fantasy I believed in. Such fantasy let me down too often! I calmed myself thinking about what digimon Sensai would be reincarnated into. I thought Piemon for sure, or perhaps Jijimon? I feel asleep without realizing it, and woke up walking happily into an apartment with a digi-egg in hand....
Journal, I'm sorry, but I just cannot write anymore today.
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Entry #3 (Nov 10 2005, 05:54 PM)
Dear book that I write in to waste time,
God, I'm an idiot. If only I had listened to AJ before inflating my ego. I never thought the digital world would be this corrupted! Dark and Light... it just doesn't make sense. There is a way to combine them, I know it! Sensai once told me. But... I forgot so much when I arrived here.
Anyway, about the Peter is Sensai theroy: No-go. Sensai never flew into rages. Never! Ok, once, but... ah, no flashbacks today. I need to depress myself some more.
Sensai, I wish you were here, where you would be alive... have your own digimon, maybe guide me and Peter.
About L.O.Z: I don't know! Is he really evil? Is he trying to kill everyone? DOES HE HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT HE IS DOING? I just never want to run into him again.
AJ: He is trying really hard to protect me, it seems. I dont know if I want protection though.
....Anyway, back to slamming my head against the damaged wall.
--
I think Peter looked at you today, journal. There was something in his eyes which I knew all too well: pure pity. Who knows how long it is before he will start writting in it? Peter, if you read this, we might as well have a little chat. Hope you feel ok after that tough battle.
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Entry #4 (Nov 11 2005, 09:56 AM)
Dear Journal,
Just a quick entry right now. I've noticed that alot of the people here seem not to be from one place and dont't speak the same languge. You would think since the digimon franchise was origanally Japanese all the digimon would speak in Japanese. However, I can understand them and everyone else. But I have an idea why this is happening. In digimon world 1, which I assumed you never played because you're just a book, the main character talks about speaking english, in the American version anyway. Then the digimon tell him he is speaking diginese or something similar. So... diginese really exists? Interesting! I ponder on....
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Entry #5 (Nov 14 2005, 08:03 PM)
Dear Journal,
I recently met the 'dark' tamer people are talking about. Not L.O.Z, but Victor Delixcroix! I followed him after the battle AJ and I fought against L.O.Z. He and his digimon seemed to have just been reunited when I came in. The poor man thought I had come to kill him. I do not want to kill anyone, but being a digimon tamer, I will have to kill some digimon to grow stronger, sadly. Humans are a different thing entirely.
After we talked Victor gave me a card, which embarassed me, since I had never recived gifts from men besdies Sensei and my brothers before then. Which reminds me, AJ gave me a ring which deflects darkness I believe. GAH! I'm no good with men, I mean, items!
Analysis time:
I suppose the time has come where I compare AJ and Victor. I dont want to, but since I think they will effect Peter and I more then anyone else in the first stages of my quest, I should look at them and decide which values I... value?
ACK! There I go again, having no clue what I have just said.
I think they both have good hearts and goals. Prehaps their ways to get to the goals are slightly odd or harmful, but still....
Anyway, they are much more alike then they realize. Both have had problems with their digi's, Fir-kun and Lab-kun, as far as I can tell. At least that is what Peter told me. But their digimon both repect them and forgave them... and came back to them. Will Peter ever leave me? I am no where near as strong as Victor or AJ, and I don't think I would waste a moment before doing something drastic. Unless of course, I had friend who needed me....
Anyway, AJ and Victor may have potential as friends, but that is just me hope-all-ends-well instinct acting up.
-
AJ and Victor both gave me visits recently. And talked about each other. Maybe that friend idea is nothing but a young girl's dreams.
Peter seems to be able to get along with most digimon, and is addicted to tag, no question.
Darn it, L.O.Z's battle popped into my mind again. Why did I attack him so strongly? Regrets, regrets, sigh.
Yeah, I wrote 'sigh', so what?
Ah, dont mind me. Period acting up. Dont tell Peter... though he probably read this already. Sigh.
-
Cleo, your gross!-P-chan ^^
-
PETER KEEP YOUR FILTHY COGS OFF MY JOURNAL! Couldn't ya get your own or something? SHEESH!
-
No, we share things, including personal moments. Stop keeping things from me!
-
I have...things that may take awhile to get out, ok? Dont push it peter.
-
...Ok.
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Entry #6 (Nov 14 2005, 09:30 PM)
Dear Journal,
Today peter asked me about 'love'. So, this is how the conversation went, mostly:
"Hey Cleo, with all the boys around, I couldn't help but wonder... you know...."
"Wha?"
"Aw come on! Do you like any guys?"
"Wel-"
"BESIDES YOUR SENSEI OR BROTHER!"
"OH! Er...well, Im not really interested in love right now"
"... Come on! You can tell me! Who do you think is hot? Come on!"
"Oh, for crying out loud peter, I'm trying to think!"
"About what? Why can't you spend a moment bonding with your digimon instead of sitting in regret over your sensei? Please, I wanna be your friend, you gotta open up to me! Im not goina force you, but still, I think you might like to have someone know about you...."
"Peter, you're very kind. I guess I can say...All the human males here are kinda... 'hot'. But I've had many a bad experiance with love. Can we leave it at that?"
"There, you're opening up! Now, tell me about your dream husband!"
"Guess we can't leave it at that...."
-
Yeah, Weird, I know, but I think Peter has something with this idea of growing our relashionship. He is a young digimon with not much else to do but fight, might as well get to know him... then again, what is there to know besides he hatched out of a digi-egg when I got to my room?
End log...er, entry.
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Entry #7 Nov 16 2005, 08:33 PM)
IF ONLY I HADN'T PROMISED SENSAI I WOULD CUT DOWN ON THE CURSES!
GRR...
Once again, my inability to think clearly in the most dire situations has let to horror. Victor, why? Seere... would she want you to act this way?
AJ-must you go fight against Victor? And... why are their digimon to cute for words?
Sorry, I still am a little crazy.
Peter is with me still. He does not want to fight today. How odd. When I dreamed of having a digimon I wished I would be the strongest possible tamer. I wanted to defeat digimon by the thousands. Sadistic? Very much. I guess it's just that I always wished I wasn't powerless.
Examples:
If I had enough power to keep Sensei from getting in the fight and getting hurt and ill.
If I managed to keep my brother with his dreams... and his girlfriend.
If I could make Peter proud of me.
I am a fool. Naive, thinking people can be changed. Thinking everyone can get along. But if that makes me a fool, then that makes all our digimons fools too!
I wish I had more power... perhaps I wouldn't have gone with the strange man that promised miracles and get Sensei enraged beyond all reason.
And power... is it worth it?
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Entry #8 (Nov 18 2005, 02:26 PM)
Dear Journal,
First of all, Random thoughts:
Perhaps I depend on you to much.
I wonder what it's like to slash a card?
Will Peter go crazy when he digivolves like Terriermon did in the Digimon Tamers?
Will I ever see AJ, Victor, or L.O.Z again?
What about Wes, the first friend I had in the digital world, who suddenly disappeared?
Anyway, Peter told me what happened when he talked with Labramon and... God, I forgot the name already! Fir-kun is what I called him before. Geez, I guess I should have expected that, It took me awhile to learn A.J's name even!
Victor's partner told Peter that....
AH! PETERS CALLING! NEED TO GO!
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Entry #9 (Dec 10 2005, 12:56 PM)
Dear Journal,
Not much happening today. Did I tell you about the odd woman? I forgot, and I'm too lazy to look through you. Anyway, Ross and Jack, the 2 brothers, are the newest members of this world's digimon team. I haven't seen AJ or Victor for awhile, though I'm grateful towards the one named 'Inari' for stopping their fight. She sounds delightful, will I ever meet her? All I think about is Hagurumon's Evolution. I wonder what will happen, and will he save me from some weird evil digimon? And if I get another digimon, will Peter feel neglected? Ah, questions, where would we be without you?
As for returning home, I have already shown how much I don't want too. Hmm... will I be the one thing standing in everyone's way once Insomnia is defeated? Scary ideas.
If I ever get another digimon I would like him/her to be:
Renamon (and it's below-forms), Wizardmon, Doumon, and Piedmon. That would be soooo awsome!
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Entry #10 (Dec 31 2005, 12:09 PM)
Dear Journal,
Peter here. I must admit, both Cleo and I are very stressed out. I'm not mad at Cleo for not following AJ and Victor just... confused.
Another reason for our stressing is that so many new tamers have come into the digital world.
"SHIT!" was what Cleo said the moment she found out. With so many new tamers, not only will there be competition at the tournament (heh), there will also be far too many dark tamers. Not that we think all tamers will be dark, but as she said before, it is quite tempting. Will the world ever survive the onslaught of Insomnia, the all-seeing, non-sleeping one?
For the moment we are in the lava-filled area of the digital world. I must admit, name-forgetting is contagious. So is miss-spelling. Anyway, we are searching for Dukemon and ImperialDramon.
Cleo cannot take the heat so if we don't get a clue within the next few days we will be leaving.
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Entry #11 (Jan 28 2006, 12:11 PM)
Dear Journal,
Hard to believe I was once a small happy little girl who would sing 'memory' from cats on the front porch, waiting for a new day to begin.
Sensei, I'm afraid I want to live the rest of my life out here. Is it a sin, not to return to reality? Your memory guides me day after day, along with the memory of the past. If I let it go, I can become stronger. Or will I? It doesn't matter, as my memories of my past are contained in these seemingly powerless pieces of paper that will hopefully be here long after the last traces of my existance are completely vanished.
AJ, Victor, I know you can't read this, but I'm not mad at you. If anything, you should be mad at me. I haven't been there for you when I should have, Instead taking out my frustations on you. I'm such a hypocrite, I live for the thrill of battle. Then again, I suppose I should not speak, I know in my heart you both have seen more bloodshed then I will ever see in my lifetime.
Is there anything I really have to say about what's going on now? Well, since when have I ever had anything important to say... or actually kept notes on what happened recently? You know by now I don't have any idea how to use a journal.
Memory, how you haunt me. Do I deserve you, am I worth it?
There are 3 versions of that song, the london, the broadway, and the never released one Tim Rice wrote.
TIm Rice's was probably the saddest, I think.
Verse 1:
Streetlights, and the darkness between them,
Like the good and the bad sides, of a life almost done
Shake the mem'ry, all my passions returning to me
None forgotten, no not one.
I've never seen it on stage, but I know enough about the plot. I'm more of a Phantom of the Opera fan myself. Still, sometimes we all feel like Grizabella, alone, unaccepted by ourfriends, longing to return to what we once were.
I haven't seen Peter in so long....
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Entry #12 (Mar 5 2006, 10:31 AM )
Hello odd book Cleo writes random stuff in,
This is Peter. By some odd 'coinincidence', Cleo had her backpack, and her journal with her when she entered the Phantom of the Opera movie. Wow, it's been awhile since she's updated it, eh? Hmm... more then a month, it seems.
Oh, why isn't Cleo writing info in herself? Well, she's kinda... injured, at the moment. You see, there was this big sword fight at the cemetary. Oh well, I DO have a talent for getting ahead of myself, don't I?
Cleo and I went to the theatre to see The Phantom of The Opera with AJ and Labramon. Gah, my head hurts. No, it doesn't matter, once Cleo gets better, she'll write more info about it, eh?
Gotta go. Adios.
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Entry #13 (Apr 9 2006, 01:21 PM)
Something is wrong.
From now on, I'll need to be stronger then ever.
I'll need to fight... we all will.
I'm alone, at last.
Entry #1 (Nov 9 2005, 07:02 PM)
Dear Journal,
Today was my first of being a Digimon tamer. My partner, Peter, A Kapurimon that seems determined to digivolve 'only when the time is right', is quite fun to be with. He is the first friend I have had in quite awhile. Peter seems to be, if you will, a foil of me. I wonder if all digimon and tamers are like that. Recently I was visited by AJ, another tamer, and his labramon. They seem quite... nice. AJ mentioned 'light and dark tamers'. Though I'd defenatly be on the light side, I do not hope to be in any battles. Being in such a war would deter me from my goal, getting Peter strong enough to... well, to be powerful enough to be in a war if such an event happens. Wow, I really have no idea what im trying to say.
I guess this is my opinion: (Note, this is just a stupid rant made to make my journal look at least partially interesting. I really dont care what people here choose to do)
Anyone can be 'dark'. It is easy and fun to have no rules in life. To pick on others. To act superiour. It is the cowards way out! Not only that, but humans are weak against its pull and are easily drawn to it. Morallity has no direct benifits, is hard, doesn't pay the bills, and really won't always make you feel better. Cheesy as what I'm about to say is, I believe it is right: Morality is worth it. Mentally, physically. Forget what I said earlier about it not being able to make you feel better. Just to know you didn't fall prey to darkness is a huge... er... I dont know the word. Oh well. Today's soapbox rant is over, time to sleep!
-Crazy Cleo
PS.: Just because you're my journal I wont reveal all my secrets to you yet ;-)
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Entry #2 (Nov 9 2005, 10:49 PM)
Dear Journal,
Yeah, it's that geeky kid who writes boring stuff in you again. I finally told someone my story, and I felt 100 times better afterwards! Its good to have friends. I know I sound TOTALLY weird when I say that, but it's true! Anyway, lemme let you in on the facts of my life up to this point:
When I was about 5, 10 years ago, I was brought to Sensai Peter's house. My brother had to travel the world for his job, so he couldn't take care of me. At first I was quite scared of the friendly old man, and just wanted to have my brother wth me. However, Sensai was very nice to me and I quickly began to love him. By the time I was 8 he taught me much more then I would have known if I had gone to a regular school up to 10th grade! He taught me some martial arts, sword skills (which I always manage to mess up), mythology, spirituality... in other words, alot. He had friends over often but none of them were ever my own age just... really, really old. I didn't mind, but Sensai, always seeming to be one step ahead, knew this would not effect me positively if I could not interact with people of my own age. When I was 10 he took me to a park, where I saw lots of children my age, playing with each other. When Sensai let me go up to them, they started to tease me immediately. Even though I could have fought them, which of corse would have gotten me in alot of trouble, I just ended up running out of the Park, crying. I really dont remeber what they said, but that doesn't matter. I was so upset that I ended up finding a secret spot and cried there for least an hour before Sensai was able to find me. He looked really mad, for some reason, which made me sob even more. Then he became symethetic and tried to calm me down. The parents of the brats who teased me talked to Sensai and wanted their children to apologize to me in person, but Sensai decied it would be best if I recovered first. I suppose it wasn't really a big deal and I didn't have to make a fuss over it, but I still lived a sheltered life up till then.
Then, a week ago, Sensai grew gravely ill. I didn't know what to do. He was taken to the hospital, where I visited him everyday. I got really into digimon at that time, since Sensai had bought me one of the video games a few days before he got ill. I always wished I could get an Angemon to help heal Sensai. I wondered if, perhaps Sensai died, he could come back as a digimon? Would that be better then being a human?
The day before I ended up in the digital world, I went to visit Sensai. His doctor was there, and told me to come with him. I was prepared for the absolute worst. That didn't happen. I think. However, Sensai had to go through an intense operation. Sure, we could a afford it, but it often did not work and had fatal results. But without it, he'd absolutely die within a week. The doctor let me make the decsion, but first let me talk to Sensai. When I saw him in the hospital, with tubes everywhere, his body frail and not at all like the holy-man-like teacher I had known. I couldn't keep from crying. He opened his eyes and slowly he looked towards me. He told me, in an incredibly weak voice, that it had been a pleasure to teach me, and that he wanted to be allowed to die.
He told me that I was ready to face the real world and should not have to worry about his health every second. It hurt me to know he only thought of my life and not his own during his possible final days. I completely broke down. I kneeled at his beside, shoved my face into a pillow near his shoulder, and cried for a good 15 minutes. All that time, I could have sworn Sensai was stroking my hair, which he always did to help me fall asleep.
The doctor eventually led me out and told me he could wait another day for my answer. I ran home, where everything reminded me of him. It was HIS HOUSE, he was the one who gave me this shelter, he gave me everything! Looking at the digimon game I cursed the creators for not sending me Qngemon, even though I knew it was impossible. Such fantasy I believed in. Such fantasy let me down too often! I calmed myself thinking about what digimon Sensai would be reincarnated into. I thought Piemon for sure, or perhaps Jijimon? I feel asleep without realizing it, and woke up walking happily into an apartment with a digi-egg in hand....
Journal, I'm sorry, but I just cannot write anymore today.
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Entry #3 (Nov 10 2005, 05:54 PM)
Dear book that I write in to waste time,
God, I'm an idiot. If only I had listened to AJ before inflating my ego. I never thought the digital world would be this corrupted! Dark and Light... it just doesn't make sense. There is a way to combine them, I know it! Sensai once told me. But... I forgot so much when I arrived here.
Anyway, about the Peter is Sensai theroy: No-go. Sensai never flew into rages. Never! Ok, once, but... ah, no flashbacks today. I need to depress myself some more.
Sensai, I wish you were here, where you would be alive... have your own digimon, maybe guide me and Peter.
About L.O.Z: I don't know! Is he really evil? Is he trying to kill everyone? DOES HE HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT HE IS DOING? I just never want to run into him again.
AJ: He is trying really hard to protect me, it seems. I dont know if I want protection though.
....Anyway, back to slamming my head against the damaged wall.
--
I think Peter looked at you today, journal. There was something in his eyes which I knew all too well: pure pity. Who knows how long it is before he will start writting in it? Peter, if you read this, we might as well have a little chat. Hope you feel ok after that tough battle.
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Entry #4 (Nov 11 2005, 09:56 AM)
Dear Journal,
Just a quick entry right now. I've noticed that alot of the people here seem not to be from one place and dont't speak the same languge. You would think since the digimon franchise was origanally Japanese all the digimon would speak in Japanese. However, I can understand them and everyone else. But I have an idea why this is happening. In digimon world 1, which I assumed you never played because you're just a book, the main character talks about speaking english, in the American version anyway. Then the digimon tell him he is speaking diginese or something similar. So... diginese really exists? Interesting! I ponder on....
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Entry #5 (Nov 14 2005, 08:03 PM)
Dear Journal,
I recently met the 'dark' tamer people are talking about. Not L.O.Z, but Victor Delixcroix! I followed him after the battle AJ and I fought against L.O.Z. He and his digimon seemed to have just been reunited when I came in. The poor man thought I had come to kill him. I do not want to kill anyone, but being a digimon tamer, I will have to kill some digimon to grow stronger, sadly. Humans are a different thing entirely.
After we talked Victor gave me a card, which embarassed me, since I had never recived gifts from men besdies Sensei and my brothers before then. Which reminds me, AJ gave me a ring which deflects darkness I believe. GAH! I'm no good with men, I mean, items!
Analysis time:
I suppose the time has come where I compare AJ and Victor. I dont want to, but since I think they will effect Peter and I more then anyone else in the first stages of my quest, I should look at them and decide which values I... value?
ACK! There I go again, having no clue what I have just said.
I think they both have good hearts and goals. Prehaps their ways to get to the goals are slightly odd or harmful, but still....
Anyway, they are much more alike then they realize. Both have had problems with their digi's, Fir-kun and Lab-kun, as far as I can tell. At least that is what Peter told me. But their digimon both repect them and forgave them... and came back to them. Will Peter ever leave me? I am no where near as strong as Victor or AJ, and I don't think I would waste a moment before doing something drastic. Unless of course, I had friend who needed me....
Anyway, AJ and Victor may have potential as friends, but that is just me hope-all-ends-well instinct acting up.
-
AJ and Victor both gave me visits recently. And talked about each other. Maybe that friend idea is nothing but a young girl's dreams.
Peter seems to be able to get along with most digimon, and is addicted to tag, no question.
Darn it, L.O.Z's battle popped into my mind again. Why did I attack him so strongly? Regrets, regrets, sigh.
Yeah, I wrote 'sigh', so what?
Ah, dont mind me. Period acting up. Dont tell Peter... though he probably read this already. Sigh.
-
Cleo, your gross!-P-chan ^^
-
PETER KEEP YOUR FILTHY COGS OFF MY JOURNAL! Couldn't ya get your own or something? SHEESH!
-
No, we share things, including personal moments. Stop keeping things from me!
-
I have...things that may take awhile to get out, ok? Dont push it peter.
-
...Ok.
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Entry #6 (Nov 14 2005, 09:30 PM)
Dear Journal,
Today peter asked me about 'love'. So, this is how the conversation went, mostly:
"Hey Cleo, with all the boys around, I couldn't help but wonder... you know...."
"Wha?"
"Aw come on! Do you like any guys?"
"Wel-"
"BESIDES YOUR SENSEI OR BROTHER!"
"OH! Er...well, Im not really interested in love right now"
"... Come on! You can tell me! Who do you think is hot? Come on!"
"Oh, for crying out loud peter, I'm trying to think!"
"About what? Why can't you spend a moment bonding with your digimon instead of sitting in regret over your sensei? Please, I wanna be your friend, you gotta open up to me! Im not goina force you, but still, I think you might like to have someone know about you...."
"Peter, you're very kind. I guess I can say...All the human males here are kinda... 'hot'. But I've had many a bad experiance with love. Can we leave it at that?"
"There, you're opening up! Now, tell me about your dream husband!"
"Guess we can't leave it at that...."
-
Yeah, Weird, I know, but I think Peter has something with this idea of growing our relashionship. He is a young digimon with not much else to do but fight, might as well get to know him... then again, what is there to know besides he hatched out of a digi-egg when I got to my room?
End log...er, entry.
------------
Entry #7 Nov 16 2005, 08:33 PM)
IF ONLY I HADN'T PROMISED SENSAI I WOULD CUT DOWN ON THE CURSES!
GRR...
Once again, my inability to think clearly in the most dire situations has let to horror. Victor, why? Seere... would she want you to act this way?
AJ-must you go fight against Victor? And... why are their digimon to cute for words?
Sorry, I still am a little crazy.
Peter is with me still. He does not want to fight today. How odd. When I dreamed of having a digimon I wished I would be the strongest possible tamer. I wanted to defeat digimon by the thousands. Sadistic? Very much. I guess it's just that I always wished I wasn't powerless.
Examples:
If I had enough power to keep Sensei from getting in the fight and getting hurt and ill.
If I managed to keep my brother with his dreams... and his girlfriend.
If I could make Peter proud of me.
I am a fool. Naive, thinking people can be changed. Thinking everyone can get along. But if that makes me a fool, then that makes all our digimons fools too!
I wish I had more power... perhaps I wouldn't have gone with the strange man that promised miracles and get Sensei enraged beyond all reason.
And power... is it worth it?
------------
Entry #8 (Nov 18 2005, 02:26 PM)
Dear Journal,
First of all, Random thoughts:
Perhaps I depend on you to much.
I wonder what it's like to slash a card?
Will Peter go crazy when he digivolves like Terriermon did in the Digimon Tamers?
Will I ever see AJ, Victor, or L.O.Z again?
What about Wes, the first friend I had in the digital world, who suddenly disappeared?
Anyway, Peter told me what happened when he talked with Labramon and... God, I forgot the name already! Fir-kun is what I called him before. Geez, I guess I should have expected that, It took me awhile to learn A.J's name even!
Victor's partner told Peter that....
AH! PETERS CALLING! NEED TO GO!
------------
Entry #9 (Dec 10 2005, 12:56 PM)
Dear Journal,
Not much happening today. Did I tell you about the odd woman? I forgot, and I'm too lazy to look through you. Anyway, Ross and Jack, the 2 brothers, are the newest members of this world's digimon team. I haven't seen AJ or Victor for awhile, though I'm grateful towards the one named 'Inari' for stopping their fight. She sounds delightful, will I ever meet her? All I think about is Hagurumon's Evolution. I wonder what will happen, and will he save me from some weird evil digimon? And if I get another digimon, will Peter feel neglected? Ah, questions, where would we be without you?
As for returning home, I have already shown how much I don't want too. Hmm... will I be the one thing standing in everyone's way once Insomnia is defeated? Scary ideas.
If I ever get another digimon I would like him/her to be:
Renamon (and it's below-forms), Wizardmon, Doumon, and Piedmon. That would be soooo awsome!
------------
Entry #10 (Dec 31 2005, 12:09 PM)
Dear Journal,
Peter here. I must admit, both Cleo and I are very stressed out. I'm not mad at Cleo for not following AJ and Victor just... confused.
Another reason for our stressing is that so many new tamers have come into the digital world.
"SHIT!" was what Cleo said the moment she found out. With so many new tamers, not only will there be competition at the tournament (heh), there will also be far too many dark tamers. Not that we think all tamers will be dark, but as she said before, it is quite tempting. Will the world ever survive the onslaught of Insomnia, the all-seeing, non-sleeping one?
For the moment we are in the lava-filled area of the digital world. I must admit, name-forgetting is contagious. So is miss-spelling. Anyway, we are searching for Dukemon and ImperialDramon.
Cleo cannot take the heat so if we don't get a clue within the next few days we will be leaving.
------------
Entry #11 (Jan 28 2006, 12:11 PM)
Dear Journal,
Hard to believe I was once a small happy little girl who would sing 'memory' from cats on the front porch, waiting for a new day to begin.
Sensei, I'm afraid I want to live the rest of my life out here. Is it a sin, not to return to reality? Your memory guides me day after day, along with the memory of the past. If I let it go, I can become stronger. Or will I? It doesn't matter, as my memories of my past are contained in these seemingly powerless pieces of paper that will hopefully be here long after the last traces of my existance are completely vanished.
AJ, Victor, I know you can't read this, but I'm not mad at you. If anything, you should be mad at me. I haven't been there for you when I should have, Instead taking out my frustations on you. I'm such a hypocrite, I live for the thrill of battle. Then again, I suppose I should not speak, I know in my heart you both have seen more bloodshed then I will ever see in my lifetime.
Is there anything I really have to say about what's going on now? Well, since when have I ever had anything important to say... or actually kept notes on what happened recently? You know by now I don't have any idea how to use a journal.
Memory, how you haunt me. Do I deserve you, am I worth it?
There are 3 versions of that song, the london, the broadway, and the never released one Tim Rice wrote.
TIm Rice's was probably the saddest, I think.
Verse 1:
Streetlights, and the darkness between them,
Like the good and the bad sides, of a life almost done
Shake the mem'ry, all my passions returning to me
None forgotten, no not one.
I've never seen it on stage, but I know enough about the plot. I'm more of a Phantom of the Opera fan myself. Still, sometimes we all feel like Grizabella, alone, unaccepted by ourfriends, longing to return to what we once were.
I haven't seen Peter in so long....
------------
Entry #12 (Mar 5 2006, 10:31 AM )
Hello odd book Cleo writes random stuff in,
This is Peter. By some odd 'coinincidence', Cleo had her backpack, and her journal with her when she entered the Phantom of the Opera movie. Wow, it's been awhile since she's updated it, eh? Hmm... more then a month, it seems.
Oh, why isn't Cleo writing info in herself? Well, she's kinda... injured, at the moment. You see, there was this big sword fight at the cemetary. Oh well, I DO have a talent for getting ahead of myself, don't I?
Cleo and I went to the theatre to see The Phantom of The Opera with AJ and Labramon. Gah, my head hurts. No, it doesn't matter, once Cleo gets better, she'll write more info about it, eh?
Gotta go. Adios.
------------
Entry #13 (Apr 9 2006, 01:21 PM)
Something is wrong.
From now on, I'll need to be stronger then ever.
I'll need to fight... we all will.
I'm alone, at last.
Cleo Rania - January 24, 2007 05:20 PM (GMT)
New (1) Journal
Journal Entry 1:
This is odd. The digital world's been completely re-written. And I'm the only person who seems to know....
I'm scared.
----
Journal Entry 2:
Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik, Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik, Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik, Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik! Why can't I have at least one female friend?
Rant over.
Journal Entry 1:
This is odd. The digital world's been completely re-written. And I'm the only person who seems to know....
I'm scared.
----
Journal Entry 2:
Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik, Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik, Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik, Suess, A.J, Victor, Erik! Why can't I have at least one female friend?
Rant over.
Cleo Rania - January 24, 2007 05:20 PM (GMT)
OOC Jorunal:
OOC Entry #1
Tidbits said or rembered by Cleo in the last DD, other important events through Cleo's eyes:
During a trip into the moive, 'The Phantom of the Opera', some very important things happened to Cleo.
She found her brother, Elliot. (Aka, THE DOC!)
A love triangle finally began to form/break with: A.J, Erik, and Victor.
Her Sensei died.
She had to make the toughest decisions of her life.
----
OOC Entry #2:
Basic DD History: -'Work' in progress-
----
OOC entry 3:
Cleo's not going to be bad, just slightly insane. Yay. Not that that matters - no one knows who she is! XD
Lover Score card:
Aj: Second friend, perhaps best friend in the digital world save Peter. Then... well, Victor came. Victor and Aj and Cleo were a love triangle for awhile - for more details, see Victor. Anyway, Seere infected Aj, Aj went bad, forgot Cleo, then went good again, and remembered Cleo. There is attraction, but if it can go anywhere is unknown.
Victor: Cleo's friend, then quickly became Cleo's first 'official' lover (then again, which girl in DD1 wasn't a lover of Victor?). Sweet for awhile while Cleo replaced Inari (who is awesome, btw) then Seere came. Then Victor went into coma. then he tried to kill Cleo in PotO. Then his creator killed him off. Then his creator left DD2. So, yeah.. he's but a memory. (Yes, Cleo is screwed up, goddamn it)
Erik: Phantom became second lover and perhaps is even more dear than Victor. After nearly marrying, Erik decided it was for the best if constantly weeping Cleo left for the surface. Then she didn't visit him due to being caught in another movie and other things (and I was going through one of my many depressions and left DD for awhile). Scared for Cleo, he left the movie world with Insomnia's power. Oh, guess what? He hates her now, and she's caught in his clutches. Cleo sucks with love.
Kyo: He certainly is passive, isn't he? In love with Cleo since they first met, and doing nothing (nearly nothing) to show it. Or make anything out of it. Maybe he's waiting. Waiting for his lazy author to make him do something interesting. When he finally gets more screen time, expect Piedmon like behavior - oh boy.
Zoe: A little silver beaked birdie told me Zoe may view the friendship between Cleo and herself as... more than friendship. Poor Macio and Kyo. But yay for loli? Here's hoping they meet up again.... (FORESHADOWFORESHADOWFORESHADW)
Sensei: Hey, you never know! Cleo sure has alot of old man issues, doesn't she? Rafiki, Erik, Victor (XD), Sensei.... But seriously, yes, there will be more than subtle evidence of some sort of relationship beyond caretaker-ward.Okay, unsubtle: Sensei overstepped his boundaries once or twice, and Cleo had to pay the (mental and physical) price.
Drak: Lolwut? I do plan on having them travel together, though.... Peter may rival Phyl for Ayanna's affections.
Odds in favor of: Aj or Zoe
Q. Hey, will Drak get a journal?
A. Maybe.
Q. Seuss gone, now what?
A. See Victor. I mean, memories are still a very strong thing for Cleo. Really, they're all she has. (FORESHADOW)
Q. DESU DESU DESU DESU
A. You has a flavor?
OOC Entry #1
Tidbits said or rembered by Cleo in the last DD, other important events through Cleo's eyes:
During a trip into the moive, 'The Phantom of the Opera', some very important things happened to Cleo.
She found her brother, Elliot. (Aka, THE DOC!)
A love triangle finally began to form/break with: A.J, Erik, and Victor.
Her Sensei died.
She had to make the toughest decisions of her life.
----
OOC Entry #2:
Basic DD History: -'Work' in progress-
----
OOC entry 3:
Cleo's not going to be bad, just slightly insane. Yay. Not that that matters - no one knows who she is! XD
Lover Score card:
Aj: Second friend, perhaps best friend in the digital world save Peter. Then... well, Victor came. Victor and Aj and Cleo were a love triangle for awhile - for more details, see Victor. Anyway, Seere infected Aj, Aj went bad, forgot Cleo, then went good again, and remembered Cleo. There is attraction, but if it can go anywhere is unknown.
Victor: Cleo's friend, then quickly became Cleo's first 'official' lover (then again, which girl in DD1 wasn't a lover of Victor?). Sweet for awhile while Cleo replaced Inari (who is awesome, btw) then Seere came. Then Victor went into coma. then he tried to kill Cleo in PotO. Then his creator killed him off. Then his creator left DD2. So, yeah.. he's but a memory. (Yes, Cleo is screwed up, goddamn it)
Erik: Phantom became second lover and perhaps is even more dear than Victor. After nearly marrying, Erik decided it was for the best if constantly weeping Cleo left for the surface. Then she didn't visit him due to being caught in another movie and other things (and I was going through one of my many depressions and left DD for awhile). Scared for Cleo, he left the movie world with Insomnia's power. Oh, guess what? He hates her now, and she's caught in his clutches. Cleo sucks with love.
Kyo: He certainly is passive, isn't he? In love with Cleo since they first met, and doing nothing (nearly nothing) to show it. Or make anything out of it. Maybe he's waiting. Waiting for his lazy author to make him do something interesting. When he finally gets more screen time, expect Piedmon like behavior - oh boy.
Zoe: A little silver beaked birdie told me Zoe may view the friendship between Cleo and herself as... more than friendship. Poor Macio and Kyo. But yay for loli? Here's hoping they meet up again.... (FORESHADOWFORESHADOWFORESHADW)
Sensei: Hey, you never know! Cleo sure has alot of old man issues, doesn't she? Rafiki, Erik, Victor (XD), Sensei.... But seriously, yes, there will be more than subtle evidence of some sort of relationship beyond caretaker-ward.Okay, unsubtle: Sensei overstepped his boundaries once or twice, and Cleo had to pay the (mental and physical) price.
Drak: Lolwut? I do plan on having them travel together, though.... Peter may rival Phyl for Ayanna's affections.
Odds in favor of: Aj or Zoe
Q. Hey, will Drak get a journal?
A. Maybe.
Q. Seuss gone, now what?
A. See Victor. I mean, memories are still a very strong thing for Cleo. Really, they're all she has. (FORESHADOW)
Q. DESU DESU DESU DESU
A. You has a flavor?
Cleo Rania - March 26, 2007 03:25 AM (GMT)
Journal entry # something:
PETER CAN EVOLVE! WHOOPIE! Oh, and I got a new digimon partner: Kyo-kun! I'm the luckiest gal! And, perhaps, I had some sugar....
Entery #632
A poem I made, once. It was about two of my friends, in the digital world....Poetry.... I have no knack for it.
Inspiration comes hard.
Rhyming comes hard.
Now what?
I find emotions that hurt, and
put them in my poetry.
And do not doubt,
there are many things that hurt.
2 friends... are you there?
Such saints and yet, such devils.
Where are you?
Do you lack the strength to face each other?
Questions... I hate them, they haunt me.
They never go.
I miss the days of childhood.
Simple days, simple lives.
Copyright, Cleo Rania, Mar 9 2006, 10:08 PM ... though it's kinda pointless. Just wanted you to know, journal, I'm a bit of an irrational person when it comes to personal belongings....
An, journal, this is a moment I'll never forget. This was in the infamous Phantom of the Opera movie (fiasco...) after Malcolm told me I didn't know how to love before Erik planned to marry me. There are grammer and spelling errors. It is narrorated by Peter, who will soon correct these mistakes, mmkay?
Sorry to lighten the mood, but it's a total angstfest. And it shows that Sensei is still watchoing over me, and still cares for me. But I hate to admit, it also means... Sensei is dead.
---
"But... but Malcolm!"
It was too late. Malcolm had left. And not only had he left the room to let poor miserable Cleo dawdle in her surly worthless thoughts... he had left her life. If... if she stayed with Erik,which she had been untill now been planning to do quite strongly, she woul dnever see any of her friends again... never.
However, she'd caused her friends enough pain. It was surely true they'd be better off without her. It would only take them a moment to realize how much better their life was without Cleo, and then they would bless her for fianlly going away. Now she would only have to inconvineance Erik. Poor Erik.
But... Malcolm... the others... they must've thought something of her to come all this way... to warn her of impending doom. No,that must've only been becuase their tamers were fond of Cleo. She'd entraped them with her wicked and impure charm.
No, it was truly disgusting how she was thinking of herself. But, no matter how hard she might try, it would be impossible for her thick, stupid soul to be able to comprhened even the tiniest bit of what her poor brother had went through. He deserved someone so much better. They all did.
"My parents are out of my life, I-I don't want their deaths to haunt me," she said to no one in particular.
She looked to the dresser. There... there was what appeared to be a knife for opening letters. She was too far to actually make out it's designs, but it was very elegant. It was silver and had some sort of animal, or pair of animals as the handles. If Cleo worked with it properly, she could end her troubles... she would end everyone's troubles. Escpecially Sully and Erik's lives. Sure, there'd be a small period of mourning. A prayer here or there. A kind word. But when it was all said and done... one less person wasn't so much a bad thing.
So, with a determined mind, Cleo got up and began to walk to the knife. Closer... one more step. Another. Only a few more seconds... a few more steps to destroy everyone's misery. The world would no longer need to worry about her... what bliss!
So close... so close. Her shaking arms guided her sweaty palms to the knife. It's handle was of... a dragon. No, it was but a coincidence. She ran her thumb along the beautiful craftmanship. There were miniture jewels of every kind set into the silver to create the dragon's body. Yellow scales... dark red eyes.... it was a proud oriental dragon. One who would leadto the young alto's death.
She ended her observation of the knife quite quickly. She was in a rush to get this done. No time to enjoy her last few moments... she didn't deserve it. She was scum. She lifted her arm, knife facing her breast. The dead silence was maddening. It alone could drive her insane. The whole world had stopped moving, stopped breathing.... stopped living, just to see her do the same. She was going to swing it, to plunge it into her heart, but something stopped her. Her arm wouldn't budge. Her eyes were tearless, for once. But... something was holding her arm. A spirit. She could have sworn, when she turned around, she saw the gentle face of her old master looking down at her. Her Sensei. He was dead.
He was crying for her. Her usual tears were placed upon his cheeks. More tears that needed to be shed for her... when would it end?
"Cleo... don't...."
Two simple words formed from the image of a dead man that probably was a figment of her imagination. That was what, ultimatly, stopped Cleo from commiting suicide. She dropped the knife and headed towards the bed. The image of her Sensei put his hand on her shoulder, and kissed her head, before smiling. He was rewarding her with his smile... it was too much. He disappeard.
The young maiden sat down on the bed and thought for a long, long time. In fact, she probably would think all her life if she wasn't distracted from her thinking.
PETER CAN EVOLVE! WHOOPIE! Oh, and I got a new digimon partner: Kyo-kun! I'm the luckiest gal! And, perhaps, I had some sugar....
Entery #632
A poem I made, once. It was about two of my friends, in the digital world....Poetry.... I have no knack for it.
Inspiration comes hard.
Rhyming comes hard.
Now what?
I find emotions that hurt, and
put them in my poetry.
And do not doubt,
there are many things that hurt.
2 friends... are you there?
Such saints and yet, such devils.
Where are you?
Do you lack the strength to face each other?
Questions... I hate them, they haunt me.
They never go.
I miss the days of childhood.
Simple days, simple lives.
Copyright, Cleo Rania, Mar 9 2006, 10:08 PM ... though it's kinda pointless. Just wanted you to know, journal, I'm a bit of an irrational person when it comes to personal belongings....
An, journal, this is a moment I'll never forget. This was in the infamous Phantom of the Opera movie (fiasco...) after Malcolm told me I didn't know how to love before Erik planned to marry me. There are grammer and spelling errors. It is narrorated by Peter, who will soon correct these mistakes, mmkay?
Sorry to lighten the mood, but it's a total angstfest. And it shows that Sensei is still watchoing over me, and still cares for me. But I hate to admit, it also means... Sensei is dead.
---
"But... but Malcolm!"
It was too late. Malcolm had left. And not only had he left the room to let poor miserable Cleo dawdle in her surly worthless thoughts... he had left her life. If... if she stayed with Erik,which she had been untill now been planning to do quite strongly, she woul dnever see any of her friends again... never.
However, she'd caused her friends enough pain. It was surely true they'd be better off without her. It would only take them a moment to realize how much better their life was without Cleo, and then they would bless her for fianlly going away. Now she would only have to inconvineance Erik. Poor Erik.
But... Malcolm... the others... they must've thought something of her to come all this way... to warn her of impending doom. No,that must've only been becuase their tamers were fond of Cleo. She'd entraped them with her wicked and impure charm.
No, it was truly disgusting how she was thinking of herself. But, no matter how hard she might try, it would be impossible for her thick, stupid soul to be able to comprhened even the tiniest bit of what her poor brother had went through. He deserved someone so much better. They all did.
"My parents are out of my life, I-I don't want their deaths to haunt me," she said to no one in particular.
She looked to the dresser. There... there was what appeared to be a knife for opening letters. She was too far to actually make out it's designs, but it was very elegant. It was silver and had some sort of animal, or pair of animals as the handles. If Cleo worked with it properly, she could end her troubles... she would end everyone's troubles. Escpecially Sully and Erik's lives. Sure, there'd be a small period of mourning. A prayer here or there. A kind word. But when it was all said and done... one less person wasn't so much a bad thing.
So, with a determined mind, Cleo got up and began to walk to the knife. Closer... one more step. Another. Only a few more seconds... a few more steps to destroy everyone's misery. The world would no longer need to worry about her... what bliss!
So close... so close. Her shaking arms guided her sweaty palms to the knife. It's handle was of... a dragon. No, it was but a coincidence. She ran her thumb along the beautiful craftmanship. There were miniture jewels of every kind set into the silver to create the dragon's body. Yellow scales... dark red eyes.... it was a proud oriental dragon. One who would leadto the young alto's death.
She ended her observation of the knife quite quickly. She was in a rush to get this done. No time to enjoy her last few moments... she didn't deserve it. She was scum. She lifted her arm, knife facing her breast. The dead silence was maddening. It alone could drive her insane. The whole world had stopped moving, stopped breathing.... stopped living, just to see her do the same. She was going to swing it, to plunge it into her heart, but something stopped her. Her arm wouldn't budge. Her eyes were tearless, for once. But... something was holding her arm. A spirit. She could have sworn, when she turned around, she saw the gentle face of her old master looking down at her. Her Sensei. He was dead.
He was crying for her. Her usual tears were placed upon his cheeks. More tears that needed to be shed for her... when would it end?
"Cleo... don't...."
Two simple words formed from the image of a dead man that probably was a figment of her imagination. That was what, ultimatly, stopped Cleo from commiting suicide. She dropped the knife and headed towards the bed. The image of her Sensei put his hand on her shoulder, and kissed her head, before smiling. He was rewarding her with his smile... it was too much. He disappeard.
The young maiden sat down on the bed and thought for a long, long time. In fact, she probably would think all her life if she wasn't distracted from her thinking.
Cleo Rania - April 18, 2007 04:01 AM (GMT)
Journal Entry #18
Hope you're happy to seem me again, J-kun, because you'll get a lot of me again... I think....
Okay, that wasted paper. How many more sheets do you - oh, yeah... that's right, Kyo... it's digital, er, your digital. You won't run out? Well, that's sad, 'cause you'll have to deal with me even longer.
Oh unresponsive Journal, what digimon would you be? A Tentomon? A Renamon? What are your secrets? Will you ever reach out to me? Did you ever think the questions would stop?
Oh! I found an old picture of Sensei!
Yep... quite the looker, ain't he?
And I just got bopped on the head... by Peter... WHO IS READING MY DIARY AGAIN... over my shoulder....
Give me a moment, 'kay?
...
'Kay, back. There IS a person whom I miss more than sensie, though. Big Brother Seuss. I knew him for barely a month, then he left my life again. Peter, slipping into his occasional psychologistmon phases, suggested I needed a more mature human to help me grow and get what he considers a life back on track again.
He's telling me, more or less, 'get another boyfriend, I wanna see you smootch someone besides The masked buy, the dark knight, and A.J....'
Again, I must write 'sigh'.
Anyway, I met a Chinese/Japanese tamer, er, reluctant tamer who's named Koenjinn! Her old digimon, Shirasaki, apparently died, and she seemed unwilling to take another partner. I doubt me and Peter helped all that much. I know she’ll be a great tamer to her new digimon, A Reremon, soon to be, I expect, a Renamon named Furunii. Koenjinn was pretty cute... I wonder if I could get some fashion tips from her next time we meet.
It seems to me, Peter, Kyo, and I seem to already be making more friends in a day than we did in most of our 2 years in the digital world!
I actually have a roommate (besides the dreaded P and K team) for the first time in my life! Her name is Osaka, and She has a Plotmon. I’ve battled her in the tourney before... and lost. Okay, my pride’s a bit dented, but the girl is so cool! She’d probably lead all the tamers... if she weren’t so darn spacey. But hey, that’s one of the coolest things about her. I do hope we become close.... or that she and Plotmon at least find Kyo, Peter, and I bearable.
Yuki is... an odd one. But I’m sure she’ll soon get a bit less... Yuki-ish... after all, we all acted that way when we came into the digital world, right?
Next journal, I’ll tell you about the shiny crest o’ Miracles I received from none other than — Sensei’s Ghost.... Er, yep. We’ll get onto that next time. Also, I’m going to a childhood favorite, the Lion King at the movie theaters. Now, I bet you’re thinking something along the lines of, ‘
What the hell? Didn’t you learn you’re lesson the first time, crazy lady?’. Nope.
Hang on, Peter wants a bedtime story... chapter 4 of Gaston Leroux’s Phantom of The Opera novel, no less.
... Okay, Peter and Kyo are asleep.
A.J... wherever you are... I miss you most of all. But you won’t remember me, will you?
---
It's midnight. One week later.
....
....
....
Kyo here. As Wizarmon.
Wow, a crest, a girl, a floating gear, a french knight, a possessed one... and the ones she is blind too.
So, Cleo is missing her big brother, her two old lovers (both french....), her perverted Sensei, other girls, a tamer named A.J, and just about everyone under the sun.
Don’t worry Cleo. Don’t worry Peter.
How about this? Peter, I help you remember your old life, and you let me with Cleo. Why do I want Cleo? She has interested me. And besides... I want to see if it is possible to make her really, truly love someone, beyond her naive innocent love.
Then again, Peter, you’re fair gain too.
Okay, the real reason? Cleo reminds me of a person I lost a long time ago. And so do you Peter.
But I’ll never love anyone again if you two die the way they did.
I’m writing this in a special ink - you’ll only see it when I want to... and I don’t want you to.----
Hope you're happy to seem me again, J-kun, because you'll get a lot of me again... I think....
Okay, that wasted paper. How many more sheets do you - oh, yeah... that's right, Kyo... it's digital, er, your digital. You won't run out? Well, that's sad, 'cause you'll have to deal with me even longer.
Oh unresponsive Journal, what digimon would you be? A Tentomon? A Renamon? What are your secrets? Will you ever reach out to me? Did you ever think the questions would stop?
Oh! I found an old picture of Sensei!
Yep... quite the looker, ain't he?
And I just got bopped on the head... by Peter... WHO IS READING MY DIARY AGAIN... over my shoulder....
Give me a moment, 'kay?
...
'Kay, back. There IS a person whom I miss more than sensie, though. Big Brother Seuss. I knew him for barely a month, then he left my life again. Peter, slipping into his occasional psychologistmon phases, suggested I needed a more mature human to help me grow and get what he considers a life back on track again.
He's telling me, more or less, 'get another boyfriend, I wanna see you smootch someone besides The masked buy, the dark knight, and A.J....'
Again, I must write 'sigh'.
Anyway, I met a Chinese/Japanese tamer, er, reluctant tamer who's named Koenjinn! Her old digimon, Shirasaki, apparently died, and she seemed unwilling to take another partner. I doubt me and Peter helped all that much. I know she’ll be a great tamer to her new digimon, A Reremon, soon to be, I expect, a Renamon named Furunii. Koenjinn was pretty cute... I wonder if I could get some fashion tips from her next time we meet.
It seems to me, Peter, Kyo, and I seem to already be making more friends in a day than we did in most of our 2 years in the digital world!
I actually have a roommate (besides the dreaded P and K team) for the first time in my life! Her name is Osaka, and She has a Plotmon. I’ve battled her in the tourney before... and lost. Okay, my pride’s a bit dented, but the girl is so cool! She’d probably lead all the tamers... if she weren’t so darn spacey. But hey, that’s one of the coolest things about her. I do hope we become close.... or that she and Plotmon at least find Kyo, Peter, and I bearable.
Yuki is... an odd one. But I’m sure she’ll soon get a bit less... Yuki-ish... after all, we all acted that way when we came into the digital world, right?
Next journal, I’ll tell you about the shiny crest o’ Miracles I received from none other than — Sensei’s Ghost.... Er, yep. We’ll get onto that next time. Also, I’m going to a childhood favorite, the Lion King at the movie theaters. Now, I bet you’re thinking something along the lines of, ‘
What the hell? Didn’t you learn you’re lesson the first time, crazy lady?’. Nope.
Hang on, Peter wants a bedtime story... chapter 4 of Gaston Leroux’s Phantom of The Opera novel, no less.
... Okay, Peter and Kyo are asleep.
A.J... wherever you are... I miss you most of all. But you won’t remember me, will you?
---
It's midnight. One week later.
....
....
....
Kyo here. As Wizarmon.
Wow, a crest, a girl, a floating gear, a french knight, a possessed one... and the ones she is blind too.
So, Cleo is missing her big brother, her two old lovers (both french....), her perverted Sensei, other girls, a tamer named A.J, and just about everyone under the sun.
Don’t worry Cleo. Don’t worry Peter.
How about this? Peter, I help you remember your old life, and you let me with Cleo. Why do I want Cleo? She has interested me. And besides... I want to see if it is possible to make her really, truly love someone, beyond her naive innocent love.
Then again, Peter, you’re fair gain too.
Okay, the real reason? Cleo reminds me of a person I lost a long time ago. And so do you Peter.
But I’ll never love anyone again if you two die the way they did.
I’m writing this in a special ink - you’ll only see it when I want to... and I don’t want you to.----
Cleo Rania - September 30, 2007 03:14 AM (GMT)
Entry# Nine-'trying to grab attention'-teen
Hu... hu.... WHA?
....
De! de? de!? de...
Fa-fa-FIVE~ FIVE! Mind works... slightly
htis si a dod fleeing, I mean, this is an odd feeling. There we go.
Dear Journal,
I’m writing because of the sake of wiring. There can be no greater pleasure in life than whittling away precious time by doing something you love - or seem to. (I’ve become a bit more formal... I don’t really have all that much of a personality, so why not do this? It seems to have a lasting effect, yet I’ve yet to test it out. Time will tell.)
How many recent things have happened? Let me count the ways (or things, as they were....)
Lion King. I’ve been turned into a Gazelle, Kyo a Finch of some sort (who keeps showing me his beak....) And Kyo has turned into a right little monkey. I suppose Gazelle’s are... fast? But we have exceedingly small brains, you see, so the issue of our speed is not merely skill, just a simple tactic to avoid our maker.
Moving on.
Let’s answer some unneeded and unasked questions, shall we? I suppose you believe that my now-simian friend (who is overjoyed to have opposable thumbs during his chuld stage) is wiritng while I am dictating, but it has not. The wonderous effects of data! I’m sure it’ll end up giving me cancer, but oh well.
While it appears I have not been able to bring my backpack here directly, whenever I enter a calm state (which can be interpreted, or misinterpreted as dreaming and/or asleep) during which, I am allowed inventory from my backpack, via my mind.
Holy fuck.
Peter claims this is the digital world’s data stream combined with the stream made from the movie (yes, I’ve discussed this issue with Peter). I think I’ll find out if this is just a dream when I return. If I return. Etc. I’m more or less using my mind to transmit my thoughts on the paper, hence the scribbles on top (one needs practice in these things, it seems. God knows how I manage to get such a big ego.)
My recent adventures on the training fields (I won’t even attempt to explain this paradox either, I suppose we can enter the training fields, AND ONLY the training fields during slumber. I’m probably wrong. This is all guess work. Guess work from a 17-year old American girl. Take this with a pinch of salt, my friend.
Joseph, the giraffe-transformed leader by qualification (he calmed us all down and brought us together. The guy’s got leadership skills. If only our ‘herd’ stopped growing smaller....) And I dueled it out in the training fields, in ol’ New York.
And I actually battled. With an icicle Punjab. Thank you, Erik.. I faced a very proper but determined Tailmon, while Joseph dealt with Kyo, and Peter was censored on national TV for shooting the area up while facing the Candmon-turned Thunderbirdmon, Kid.
I lost.
Not a big deal, considering I’ve heard Joseph is the master of battle tactics. Big deal, considering I haven’t won any fights since L.O.Z, practically. Which leads us to our next example
Remember A.J? Yu damn well better, because he doesn’t remember himself! The more of us who remember, the more he’s still there, I suppose. Oops, more 17-year old girl logic slipped in there. I need a thought sponge. I’ll ask Kyo about that soon.
A battle raged between friends! Memories remembered, tears shed! Drama, Romance, Action! Androids fighting fire-spewing monstrous dogs! It had it all. Even side conversations between Kyo and AJ’s new digimon (Piyomon, Armadimon, and Lunamon respectively... they deserve respect) had the occasional comic-book ‘Pow’ interspaced between it.
A.J’s not whom I remember, there’s no doubt about it. But maybe, if he’s happy, I can be too.
We’re still in the Lion King, still basking in the event of Simba’s birth. Now, we need to come to terms we’re trapped together for an extended period of time. No, that’s not all!
Ryuha and Zack left. Gone. One less bird, one less primate, and 3 less digimon does a happy camper not make. Sorry, another mind blurb... thing. I hope minds have white out or erasers. Then there’s Riley, whom I remember hearing about from the old digital world (the world before it got reformatted). He.... disappeared. Then reappeared. Then there’s tales of bearmon. Where have I heard of bearmon before? Erik once mentioned them. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen Erik, and it will probably be even longer. I was unable to go because I believe the movie was lost. The Barbmon at the theater’s desk wouldn’t bring Phantom movie back, even if I bribed her.
Or maybe I’m trying to make excuses. You decide.
The disappearance of the two tamers has left us two great mind short (though I do not claim to know them very well, I was just as shy as many of the others.) But I’ll take the time to reflect on those I do know. I will only mention the Tamers, not because they’re less important, only because, well... my mind will only remember so much. My digimon will you in on the other digimon later. I think. We’ve broken promises, even to you, Journal, before.
Joseph needs no introduction, and because of that, he needs one to explain why. The tamer I fought, the tactical genius, the guy who’s a year old than me and not too bad lookin’. And he and a certain disappeared female had seemed to have interest in one another. Let’s not mention a certain feline, er, lion-caracal duo who seem to have a few tender moments of happiness in the harsh pride Lands together.
I digress. Wow, I’m a bit of an ass.
Joe is our undisputed leader, the one who went head to head with the big lion himself, Mufasa-sasa-san. Mufasa-sasa-san seems to think we’re little threat, though our d-bans gave him a bit of worry. But this is Joseph’s 15 sentences of journal entry, not Mufasa-sasa-san’s. He has a good head on his shoulders, er, neck, that one. Gwen has become a caracal, and I believe Kid has turned into a bird as well, but my mind is fuzzy.
Next is the adorably cute and annoyingly hyperactive Brazilian fan caracal, Zoë. Like Joseph, who needs more attention and less digressing when I refer to him, she is a universe packed intro a digimon tamer. I wish I knew more about her, but sadly, I’ve only conversed with her a precious few times during our time in this world. These worlds. World. Etc. Her beloved Gabu-hog, Macio, seems both bemused and joyful at his tamer’s multiple reactions (and volumes, and way of pronouncing things), in exchange for seeing his irmã’s favorite movie.
Next is Koenjinn-chan, the reluctant tamer, and her happy go lucky (and perhaps a bit ornery) Furunii-san have joined the ragtag band as a cheetah and turtle, respectively once more. We need respect. I’m unsure what to add to her description....
Oh, she’s a brilliant singer, just needs confidence. I don’t think she’ll need to go through the whole Angel-of-music-kidnaping routine, though, so she’s safe.
Alex Ark has since been scarce as well, as far as I can tell. I’ve traded with him a few times, and he’s an all-around cool guy. While he was in the movie, he had some ‘my digimon keeps wanting to eat me’ issues. Ah, young tamership.
Ryuha was smart, quick witted, playful with her digimon... and long gone. Zack was quiet, resilient, thoughtful... and also gone. IT’s not that they’re not important! It’s that my Gazelle brain was too small to observe all their personality quirks. I’m sure I’ll be rather awkward around them, should I ever see them again. I mean, you must have a heart of ice to include so little of someone in your secret journal.
I don’t even know if I’,m going for a laugh or just plain disrespectful now. If it’s the latter, I sincerely hope I stop. Stop it, Cleo! There.
Letsee... Somehow I can scan what I’ve wrote. This is giving me a headache. I’ve written at least a bit about Riley. Now, I need to make my Gazelle’s brain work (5 points for including the joke a 3rd time,) and remember some more. Riley’s digimon consist of a obnoxiously cute baby meerkat and eager young adult lion, so says my limited insight skills.
Then there’s Taz. Terry has a heart of gold, and a brain of bronze. Wait, no, that’ s disrespectful. How about... He’s like me? No, that’s even worse. Alright, the Hawkmon-turned naked mole rat (Oh la la!) Has a tendency to say laugh-out loud things, whether he knows it or not. Once again, Journal, limited insight. Limited insight. The lion seems gruff and silent. Limited insight. Taz seems alright, but I’ve not gotten the pleasure to know her well enough, so I can’t even use the above ‘limited insight’ excuse to fudge it over.
Then there s Cleo. ‘Nuff said.
Gosh, I feel better thinking for once. That came out wrong. Well, if anyone reads this, I’m sure to be stoned, so no need to worry about my stupidity, or lack thereof... or surplus thereof.
-Ellipsis Queen out.-
Hu... hu.... WHA?
....
De! de? de!? de...
Fa-fa-FIVE~ FIVE! Mind works... slightly
htis si a dod fleeing, I mean, this is an odd feeling. There we go.
Dear Journal,
I’m writing because of the sake of wiring. There can be no greater pleasure in life than whittling away precious time by doing something you love - or seem to. (I’ve become a bit more formal... I don’t really have all that much of a personality, so why not do this? It seems to have a lasting effect, yet I’ve yet to test it out. Time will tell.)
How many recent things have happened? Let me count the ways (or things, as they were....)
Lion King. I’ve been turned into a Gazelle, Kyo a Finch of some sort (who keeps showing me his beak....) And Kyo has turned into a right little monkey. I suppose Gazelle’s are... fast? But we have exceedingly small brains, you see, so the issue of our speed is not merely skill, just a simple tactic to avoid our maker.
Moving on.
Let’s answer some unneeded and unasked questions, shall we? I suppose you believe that my now-simian friend (who is overjoyed to have opposable thumbs during his chuld stage) is wiritng while I am dictating, but it has not. The wonderous effects of data! I’m sure it’ll end up giving me cancer, but oh well.
While it appears I have not been able to bring my backpack here directly, whenever I enter a calm state (which can be interpreted, or misinterpreted as dreaming and/or asleep) during which, I am allowed inventory from my backpack, via my mind.
Holy fuck.
Peter claims this is the digital world’s data stream combined with the stream made from the movie (yes, I’ve discussed this issue with Peter). I think I’ll find out if this is just a dream when I return. If I return. Etc. I’m more or less using my mind to transmit my thoughts on the paper, hence the scribbles on top (one needs practice in these things, it seems. God knows how I manage to get such a big ego.)
My recent adventures on the training fields (I won’t even attempt to explain this paradox either, I suppose we can enter the training fields, AND ONLY the training fields during slumber. I’m probably wrong. This is all guess work. Guess work from a 17-year old American girl. Take this with a pinch of salt, my friend.
Joseph, the giraffe-transformed leader by qualification (he calmed us all down and brought us together. The guy’s got leadership skills. If only our ‘herd’ stopped growing smaller....) And I dueled it out in the training fields, in ol’ New York.
And I actually battled. With an icicle Punjab. Thank you, Erik.. I faced a very proper but determined Tailmon, while Joseph dealt with Kyo, and Peter was censored on national TV for shooting the area up while facing the Candmon-turned Thunderbirdmon, Kid.
I lost.
Not a big deal, considering I’ve heard Joseph is the master of battle tactics. Big deal, considering I haven’t won any fights since L.O.Z, practically. Which leads us to our next example
Remember A.J? Yu damn well better, because he doesn’t remember himself! The more of us who remember, the more he’s still there, I suppose. Oops, more 17-year old girl logic slipped in there. I need a thought sponge. I’ll ask Kyo about that soon.
A battle raged between friends! Memories remembered, tears shed! Drama, Romance, Action! Androids fighting fire-spewing monstrous dogs! It had it all. Even side conversations between Kyo and AJ’s new digimon (Piyomon, Armadimon, and Lunamon respectively... they deserve respect) had the occasional comic-book ‘Pow’ interspaced between it.
A.J’s not whom I remember, there’s no doubt about it. But maybe, if he’s happy, I can be too.
We’re still in the Lion King, still basking in the event of Simba’s birth. Now, we need to come to terms we’re trapped together for an extended period of time. No, that’s not all!
Ryuha and Zack left. Gone. One less bird, one less primate, and 3 less digimon does a happy camper not make. Sorry, another mind blurb... thing. I hope minds have white out or erasers. Then there’s Riley, whom I remember hearing about from the old digital world (the world before it got reformatted). He.... disappeared. Then reappeared. Then there’s tales of bearmon. Where have I heard of bearmon before? Erik once mentioned them. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen Erik, and it will probably be even longer. I was unable to go because I believe the movie was lost. The Barbmon at the theater’s desk wouldn’t bring Phantom movie back, even if I bribed her.
Or maybe I’m trying to make excuses. You decide.
The disappearance of the two tamers has left us two great mind short (though I do not claim to know them very well, I was just as shy as many of the others.) But I’ll take the time to reflect on those I do know. I will only mention the Tamers, not because they’re less important, only because, well... my mind will only remember so much. My digimon will you in on the other digimon later. I think. We’ve broken promises, even to you, Journal, before.
Joseph needs no introduction, and because of that, he needs one to explain why. The tamer I fought, the tactical genius, the guy who’s a year old than me and not too bad lookin’. And he and a certain disappeared female had seemed to have interest in one another. Let’s not mention a certain feline, er, lion-caracal duo who seem to have a few tender moments of happiness in the harsh pride Lands together.
I digress. Wow, I’m a bit of an ass.
Joe is our undisputed leader, the one who went head to head with the big lion himself, Mufasa-sasa-san. Mufasa-sasa-san seems to think we’re little threat, though our d-bans gave him a bit of worry. But this is Joseph’s 15 sentences of journal entry, not Mufasa-sasa-san’s. He has a good head on his shoulders, er, neck, that one. Gwen has become a caracal, and I believe Kid has turned into a bird as well, but my mind is fuzzy.
Next is the adorably cute and annoyingly hyperactive Brazilian fan caracal, Zoë. Like Joseph, who needs more attention and less digressing when I refer to him, she is a universe packed intro a digimon tamer. I wish I knew more about her, but sadly, I’ve only conversed with her a precious few times during our time in this world. These worlds. World. Etc. Her beloved Gabu-hog, Macio, seems both bemused and joyful at his tamer’s multiple reactions (and volumes, and way of pronouncing things), in exchange for seeing his irmã’s favorite movie.
Next is Koenjinn-chan, the reluctant tamer, and her happy go lucky (and perhaps a bit ornery) Furunii-san have joined the ragtag band as a cheetah and turtle, respectively once more. We need respect. I’m unsure what to add to her description....
Oh, she’s a brilliant singer, just needs confidence. I don’t think she’ll need to go through the whole Angel-of-music-kidnaping routine, though, so she’s safe.
Alex Ark has since been scarce as well, as far as I can tell. I’ve traded with him a few times, and he’s an all-around cool guy. While he was in the movie, he had some ‘my digimon keeps wanting to eat me’ issues. Ah, young tamership.
Ryuha was smart, quick witted, playful with her digimon... and long gone. Zack was quiet, resilient, thoughtful... and also gone. IT’s not that they’re not important! It’s that my Gazelle brain was too small to observe all their personality quirks. I’m sure I’ll be rather awkward around them, should I ever see them again. I mean, you must have a heart of ice to include so little of someone in your secret journal.
I don’t even know if I’,m going for a laugh or just plain disrespectful now. If it’s the latter, I sincerely hope I stop. Stop it, Cleo! There.
Letsee... Somehow I can scan what I’ve wrote. This is giving me a headache. I’ve written at least a bit about Riley. Now, I need to make my Gazelle’s brain work (5 points for including the joke a 3rd time,) and remember some more. Riley’s digimon consist of a obnoxiously cute baby meerkat and eager young adult lion, so says my limited insight skills.
Then there’s Taz. Terry has a heart of gold, and a brain of bronze. Wait, no, that’ s disrespectful. How about... He’s like me? No, that’s even worse. Alright, the Hawkmon-turned naked mole rat (Oh la la!) Has a tendency to say laugh-out loud things, whether he knows it or not. Once again, Journal, limited insight. Limited insight. The lion seems gruff and silent. Limited insight. Taz seems alright, but I’ve not gotten the pleasure to know her well enough, so I can’t even use the above ‘limited insight’ excuse to fudge it over.
Then there s Cleo. ‘Nuff said.
Gosh, I feel better thinking for once. That came out wrong. Well, if anyone reads this, I’m sure to be stoned, so no need to worry about my stupidity, or lack thereof... or surplus thereof.
-Ellipsis Queen out.-
Cleo - September 23, 2008 09:37 PM (GMT)
Holy fuck its' almost been a year.
Yeah, hi journal. Hi. How’ve you been? No, don’t answer that. Shut up. I’m sick.. sick of everything. Oh, goddamn it. And goddamn me too. No singing or pretty voice or crying or knights in shining armor or random old men or lions or angels in sanctuaries can save me now, can they?
And you’re not going to pop out and help me? Nope, didn’t think so. Yeah. Soon, I’m sure, I’ll be gone from this world. Screw it. I’ve decided, I’ve really decided I’m worthless. Get someone else to raise Peter and Kyo and write in your digital pages. Get someone else to do it. I quit.
---------------------------------------
Yeah… 5 hours later I come crawling back. Sorry sorry, goddamn sorry. Yes, I’m apologizing to you. Poor little book which contains the randomness of my random thoughts. I’m just... lost. I come into this world alone, afraid, with Peter in tow and a dead guardian back home. I had no social skills, no skills in anything but singing. And here I am, trapped in a coffin. I feel like I’m trapped in life, really. Now, Kyo comes along, and we haven’t bonded, in fact, done much since the world reverted. What is my purpose here? I recently had a breakdown in Erik’s coffin. Yes, I hate myself, yes, I think I’m worthless. But I want to change. Why do people like me? There must be a reason. Oh, who am I kidding, I’m alone in a cave in a coffin of a madman who hates me because I forgot to visit him. Because I played with his heart. I wonder if I got what I deserve.
If I survive, what do I do? I’ve seen people go evil and go light. I could of out killing tamers with Peter, but what’s the use? I don’t want to do that. I met Insomnia and a minion of hers, and while I can see what she … okay, I can’t say I understand her, but I can say I understand… something. I don’t hate Insomnia; hell, I don’t have anything against her in the least. But… I’m not her, and I’m not going to be Kyoko. I’m going to be myself.
I hope I can find myself.
All this time you were pretending, so much for my happy ending. (OOC: Thanks to Alex Jr and his playlist)
(OOC: I’m unsure if anyone reads this, but to whoever does – I’d love to hear what you think, but more than that: TELL ME WHAT YOU’D LIKE TO SEE IN THE JOURNAL! Less angst, more bad puns, less bad puns, more creepy Sensei, tap dancing nuns? LES SPRELLING ERROS/F'IXD SPELLERING EROS? Tell me any requests you have, please!)
Yes, next journal entry/future adventures will be happier. Please give a warm round of applause to Keno-chan/kun and Arisu!
Yeah, hi journal. Hi. How’ve you been? No, don’t answer that. Shut up. I’m sick.. sick of everything. Oh, goddamn it. And goddamn me too. No singing or pretty voice or crying or knights in shining armor or random old men or lions or angels in sanctuaries can save me now, can they?
And you’re not going to pop out and help me? Nope, didn’t think so. Yeah. Soon, I’m sure, I’ll be gone from this world. Screw it. I’ve decided, I’ve really decided I’m worthless. Get someone else to raise Peter and Kyo and write in your digital pages. Get someone else to do it. I quit.
---------------------------------------
Yeah… 5 hours later I come crawling back. Sorry sorry, goddamn sorry. Yes, I’m apologizing to you. Poor little book which contains the randomness of my random thoughts. I’m just... lost. I come into this world alone, afraid, with Peter in tow and a dead guardian back home. I had no social skills, no skills in anything but singing. And here I am, trapped in a coffin. I feel like I’m trapped in life, really. Now, Kyo comes along, and we haven’t bonded, in fact, done much since the world reverted. What is my purpose here? I recently had a breakdown in Erik’s coffin. Yes, I hate myself, yes, I think I’m worthless. But I want to change. Why do people like me? There must be a reason. Oh, who am I kidding, I’m alone in a cave in a coffin of a madman who hates me because I forgot to visit him. Because I played with his heart. I wonder if I got what I deserve.
If I survive, what do I do? I’ve seen people go evil and go light. I could of out killing tamers with Peter, but what’s the use? I don’t want to do that. I met Insomnia and a minion of hers, and while I can see what she … okay, I can’t say I understand her, but I can say I understand… something. I don’t hate Insomnia; hell, I don’t have anything against her in the least. But… I’m not her, and I’m not going to be Kyoko. I’m going to be myself.
I hope I can find myself.
All this time you were pretending, so much for my happy ending. (OOC: Thanks to Alex Jr and his playlist)
(OOC: I’m unsure if anyone reads this, but to whoever does – I’d love to hear what you think, but more than that: TELL ME WHAT YOU’D LIKE TO SEE IN THE JOURNAL! Less angst, more bad puns, less bad puns, more creepy Sensei, tap dancing nuns? LES SPRELLING ERROS/F'IXD SPELLERING EROS? Tell me any requests you have, please!)
Yes, next journal entry/future adventures will be happier. Please give a warm round of applause to Keno-chan/kun and Arisu!