Scarab Dynasty and I started this train of speculation via MSN. The idea: what if Ace Lightning had a huge fanbase with the Sturgeon-expected complement of morons? What would annoy us in fanfic hypothetically written? Think fanficrants: the hypothetical version. 'Cause ranting is fun even if it's about the technically nonexistent. :P

Discussions concerning what would be the likely fate of particular characters left to the majority of a theoretical fanbase and the rationale behind the sorts of stories that might be written are welcome.

Examples:

"Dear fanbrats. It would not kill you to make Lord Fear convincingly evil once in a while. Yes, canon doesn't always show him as competent. However, he remains the most powerful villain of the Sixth Dimension, being on Earth no doubt threw him off somewhat, the minions brought with him are either incompetent or treacherous, and intelligence/cunning is supposedly his greatest strength. It makes for a more dramatic story structure when you do not make him a complete buffoon. Humour is great, but remember he has lots of potential to be sinister (for example, writing from LI's POV)."

"Sparx is undoubtedly impulsive and irrational. However, she is also an adult with a full-time job who is actually capable of responsibility at times. Please don't make her sound like a sugar-high kid unless you're attempting humourfic, and even THEN it's irritating."

"Do I really need to point out that by definition a skeleton is missing certain fleshy parts of the anatomy? However, note that the chararacter has extensible limbs and long fingers. Consider using your imagination." (*actual fanficrant)

"Yes, I hate Kat too. However, this does not mean Mark is instantly going to fall for the new girl in town. Yes, even if she is a blue-haired Japanese martial arts expert."

"Sixth Dimension OCs are great. I love them, really. Anything connected with the world so pushes my buttons. However, if your OC is LI's elven vampire sorcerer cousin who causes both Sparx and LI to fall madly in love with him and beats Ace in a fight, this might not be such a good idea."

"Chuck already has a canon girlfriend. Her name is Jessica. She is also somewhat expert with technology. Please stop bringing in your new Mary-Sue tech experts."

"Rick's sexual orientation is undoubtedly undefined. However, he would not want to pursue any sort of romantic relationship with Chuck. Especially a non-consensual one."

"Next-gen fic? Okay, fair enough. Next-gen fic with housewife!LI? Not bloody likely. Househusband!Ace is more plausible. Also, even if they were so unfortunate as to spawn the most powerful elemental shapeshifter mage ever born, they would probably not call her Brytney Kaydee Wytch."

"Please do not demonize Heather. Her best friend suddenly went off to boarding school just before she started high school in a new environment, and Mark stood her up extremely publicly. She has some reasons for acting the way she does, and her acts are limited to verbal bullying; please try to write her as a human being rather than a caricature of evil. Calling her 'bitch' in the narrative also violates your omniscient third-person, by the way."

I think you used all the best ones. :P

"Please note that it's technically impossible for your Mary Sue to upstage both Mark and Brett on the school soccer team, as it is an all male team. And no, having them use their skillz to battle against those oh-so-sexist lead males for Women's Rights on Soccer Pitches Everywhere doesn't make it okay."

Bleh.

Okies... lets see if my brain will work sufficiently...

"Just because Rick is nasty, evil and scary does not make him a pedophile. He hates kids, remember?"

"While I love Random and all, I seriously doubt Ace is going to instantly forgive him for killing LI, Mark, half of the ninth grade and Kat's dog. Niether will it make Random suddenly turn around and vow to be not evil for the rest of his life once he sees what he is capable is. I suspect it's more likely to result in suicide."

"Please explain again how Ace fell in love with the new uber evil who is so much better than Lady Illusion? I think I must have missed something."

"Random has serious mental issues. The Powah of your Sue's love isn't going to change that. And I hope I don't have to point out the problems with the Power of Sex, either . . . "

I love that one. :D And your soccer one, Anna.

"Yes, femslash is great. However, Sparx and LI are not going to fall straight into each other's arms even if your Mary-Sue thinks they make a great couple."

"Can you explain to me once again how Kilobyte/Fear slash is supposed to work? I think I missed it the first time."

"No, Kilobyte's not going to give up on being evil. No, this includes if he thinks Ace's daughter is really hot."

"If Ace somehow lost the requisite number of brain cells, common sense, and decency in order to prompt him to request LI to morph into a Halle Berry-lookalike, she would pulverise him."

Okay... we're not a popular enough fandom to have fanbrats, so we... invent them...You guys realise this is really sad, right? :P

Oh well.

This also applies in he thinks ACE is really hot.

"It's highly implausible that sparx will quote shakespeare in Ace's general direction for any reason whatsoever. if I see any tragic casting of her as Ophelia, doomed as a result of Ace's unrequited love, then I'm afraid, I shall have to choke a fanbrat or three."

"Random Good and Random Evil" cannot be cast as two seperate individuals, except in the metaphysical term. At least, not without some kind of technological videogame splitting sci fi stuff going on. He has what could be described as MPD, but he's not a retrovirus. Not like THAT."

"Mark is at the most fifteen years old in the canon. If you're GOING to write the pr0n, please, at least take THAT into account. Please."

"Does Li (out of morph) really LOOK like the type to lure little children into gignerbread houses in the deep dark woods so she can eat them? (And don't start with that goddamned "looks can be decieving routine, this is ACE LIGHTNING, the stereotypes are too blindingly obvious for anything to be that meaningful.)"

I don't care how long you think Sparx was in that bubble waiting for soembody to bust her out. It's highly doubtful that she'd be bored enough to say anything MORE to the Rat than what she said on screen. Ew. Just ew."

These are very funny, here's a few of my own...

"For my own sanity, I am going to forget this fic in a few minutes. Even if Ace Lightning did turn evil of his own free will which I doubt could ever happen: Lord Fear and Ace Lightning together, is just wrong. Very, very wrong."

" From what you have just written about Lady 'Delusion' and Sparky the male lightning knight, I can tell you either have a quite defunct memory or have only watched a few episodes. I am guessing the former."

" Original Characters are fine. But introducing Angel Valleria, the amazing new girl in town who not only is amazingly beautiful getting Ace Lightning fall hopelessly in love with her but can also destroy anything that crosses her path AND is really Mark's long lost twin sister... Uh if it walks like a Mary Sue and talks like a Mary Sue... well fanbrat you get the picture." :P :D :lol:


Anyway loved this one Sarah.

Hee. :)

"While in this particular case I am forced to admit that due to the existence of the horrendous cliche which you in fact employ it is reasonably plausible that the dimensions of Ace/Kilobyte's--well, I think 'organ' is the appropriate word here, isn't it?--are that ridiculously exaggerated. However, the probable reaction of a partner is more likely to be along the lines of 'AARGHPAIN' than 'Score!'"

"I'm afraid your Mary-Sue's knowledge of Freud is not as unique or original as you think it is. And I'm sure that in three hundred or so years of undead existence, Lord Fear has already heard all possible puns involving "organ"/"staff"/"bone"/"sword"/"lance"/"tower"."

"Okay, I can accept that Sam went away to Hogwarts. Rick as Lord Voldemort's illegitimate Squib son? All right, I'll live with that. LI calling Hermione Granger "mistress"? Okay, totally behind the kinky femslash here. But the Kilobyte/Dumbledore? No. Just no."

...Okay, see, Sarah, before it was fun, not I'm just scared.

I'll stop laughing at this soon... really I will ^_^

Noooot nessecarily, you know, Lady Illusion gets a whole lotta points on the standard mary sue litmus test, as does sparx,. as do many of the OC's we've created ourselves. It's more about how they work in a setting etc, etc, we've all heard this a hundred times before.

“Hey, fanbrats! See that pink, crackling weapon, which Sparx is using to blow a huge hole in Pigface’s behind right now? Yeah. It’s called a Sword of JACOB. There is also the Shield of JUSTICE. Their abbreviations are identical, but nothing more. Please remember this and try not to mix them up. think how DANGEROUS doing that could be in canon.”

If I see you spelling Sparx with a “ks” one more time I swear I am going to scream. I know we don’t have the official site anymore *checks just to be sure… nope, no official site :(* but seriously, people, It’s GENERAL KNOWLEDGE.

“Dear fanbrat. Chuck exists. No, really, he does, see? The guy right there on the screen with the specs and goofy grin. He’s like… saved their hides on several occasions. He keeps mark company through the insane mess that is his life. I know he’s a goofball, but they wouldn’t have gotten out of several big scrapes without him. Stop trying to eliminate him from existence.”

*still has mental age of around twelve* :P

"High school AUs work when they are done correctly. Cheerleader!LI does not qualify as 'correct'."

"You call this character Sparx, but as she is a long-haired princess wangsting over Ace while wearing what sounds like an incredibly expensive dress, I do not think she is the Sparx of our fandom."

"Also, Ace is not going to start cutting himself, wearing black and writing bad poetry any time soon.
Yes, even if he is depressed about Lady Illusion."

*dies*

"While I appreciate your attempt to make Kat a less flat character, I hardly think she is likely to strap Mark to a chair and attempt what you described in such vivid detail."

"While you can label fanfics by terms such as: AU, SLASH; and describe them as: angsty, containing violence etc, I really do not think that 'OOC' is an acceptable label." (Okay, and I actually saw that label on a fanfic somewhere. :blink: )

Yeah we've seen most of these some place or other <_< Depressing, ain't it?

"Look, about the slash. I'm up for that, okay? But Ace SAYS (canon, people, it exists!) he's "never flirted before" to Lady Illusion before they started, so there is the potential he may not know. He would not have wasted all the program memory trying to pretend he WAS in love with Lady illusion while secretly hardouring a thing for Random, If he did, I doubt very much he knew the context in which the attraction fitted. They're working to programs, remember? Which have this nasty habit of being biased towrad smale/female relatinships. Work on breaking that down...

And while we're at it, don't forget Random is a 'Borg and lacks the nessecary anatomy, ne?"

*next one transferred irect fromn a comment in the justice leqgue section... poor, poor Wally... and yes, yes I DID make all these comments on ONE story.*

"Yes, I KNOW Mark needs character development but there's alist of things he's not.

a) Horribly shy
B) psychopathic
c) a rapist (where the HELL did you get that one???)
d) going to cheat on Kat... not with HEATHER., anyway.
e) eight years old
f) a sex symbol/extreme flirt (yeah, I know the girls go for him, but thats a wee bit too far).
g) violent towards women (though certain women towards him may be another matter :P)

Please, just try and develop the characteristics he actually HAS (few as they may be), okay?

"Ace is a relatively innocent and at times very sweet character. Please do not make him into your uber-destructive Gary-Stu. The Knights would likely have to pay for all those buildings he damaged, anyway."

"Both Lady Illusion and Sparx would be highly likely to do something exceptionally nasty to anyone referring to them as 'ho'. Especially if that someone happens to be your rapper Stu."

"Lady Illusion is not likely to keep the blue rollerskating panda/leopard/phoenix hybrid pet you give her. She's far likely to have a spider or other creepy-crawly."

These are really funny :D Sad since, it's just our rants but still very funny.

"I am sure a fusion fan fiction between Ace Lightning and Star Wars was a good idea at the time. But casting Lord Fear as Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader and Sam as Padme Amidala... there is a realm of good judgement begging to make your acquaintance".

"Mark and Kat did get together in the series, yes. But I highly doubt if she died that Mark would run around the town killing everyone in his path and then beat Kilobyte to death with a baseball bat".

"What part of Rick hates kids do you not understand?"

Well, I'm finding this fun, probably because I wouldn't really be this nasty if someone did write some of this stuff... maybe. ;)

"Yes, Ace is a bit angsty at the moment. But I doubt his primary wangst point is going to be 'no one understands me! I shall now kill myself' (also see: Lightning Knights don't die when they run out of power, they simply go back to 6D, which I don't think Ace is wanting at the moment) just because Sparx laughs at the fact he loses a game of ping pong."

"I fail to see how Miss Pretty Pants (I'm sorry, I can't remember her name, except that it was poorly spelt and her parents must have been on something) can pull enough power out of Mark's wrist cannon to obliterate Kilobyte in one shot. Yes, even if Ace is her father."

God you girls rock

and yes, yes it is sad, but do we care? :P

"I highly doubt Mark is going to use the phrases 'kryllian miles' in everyday language on purpose. He's been correcting Ace on the basic nuances of human language since the start."

Okay I know this thread is all defunct but anyways....


'Yes, there was a chracter called Kat that was intoduced in Season Two. No, nobody liked her. Yes we all would be amused if she left town/died- but was it entirely nessesary or plausible to have Mark and Heather overcome their mutual dislike to beat Kat to death with the dodgeballs?"

'I really don't care how you stole the name Drusilla from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, just please even if by some nightmarish horror that Lord Fear would spawn a desendent- I doubt 'Drusilla Fear' would have pale ivory skin, long white hair and look like a supermodel- she would look like a skeleton. Hello this myay be fictionous, but there's such thing as a credible storyline... genetics even!'

' The idea of a switchover as Mark being the hero from the game and Ace being the sidekick who just moved from England was great really. Then you spoiled it by just switching the name Ace for Mark and vise versa, again and again... and again...'

' Ace Lightning is a hero, say it with me. He is noble, and evry word that ould be assosiated with good. He would never cheat on Illusion with Sparx's half sister who is also part archangel'

Oh, I read that one. :P (Their making out aftwewards was simply going too far. XD

I am a geek.

"Chuck is not stupid. he was not stupid when he first appeared on the series and began regailing up with a frankly impressive knowledge of videogames. he has not suddely become an idiot in the interimittent period. Please do not treat him as such". :P

I'd imagine Mark and Heather killing Kat and then have mad passionate love together. :huh: Ew!